Possible OkCupid date tonight

I chose my words very carefully yesterday when I said “I really don’t have any desire to engage with anyone new.” Because I do, in fact, have something lined up with a guy from OkCupid. But he’s not new. We started talking a few months ago.

Let’s call him…ugh I don’t know! Am I really back to writing about my OkCupid dates again?!

Sigh…fine, I’ll call him…Rufus. (That is a reference to the most excellent movie Bill and Ted’s Excellent Adventure, which I quote in my profile and which he talked about in his very first message to me.)

We first started talking at the end of June, but then I went away and then he went away and our schedules just never meshed and we stopped messaging. Then at the end of July he messaged me to see if I was still interested. I told him that I was seeing someone (New Guy), but good luck on OkCupid. Then I deactivated my account.

So last Wednesday I was out getting drinks with my friends, one of whom is also on OkCupid, and we had our apps opened and were “reviewing” all the guys who messaged or looked at our profiles, deciding who was worthy. Lol. I noticed that Rufus had checked out my profile. I showed my friends his pictures, and they decided that he was really cute and that I needed to message him immediately.

I wasn’t sure what to say, since I was semi “embarrassed” to be contacting him so soon after declaring that I was off the market. (“Embarrassed” is in quotes because I don’t know this guy so I don’t actually give a damn what he thinks. But you know what I mean.) I ended up sending the following:

So obviously that “someone” didn’t work out lol. Nice to see you’re still on here. 🙂

He responded, and over the next few days we set up tentative plans to hang out this week. But now that the day has come, I don’t wanna go! I get out of work at 5:30, but he’s not available until 8-8:30 (which I bet will end up turning into 9). I could kill time by going to Zumba at 6:30, which is what I really wanted to do after work anyway, but if I do that I will be a sweaty mess. Even if I take a shower at the gym I still won’t be looking 100%, because my hair would probably have to stay in a ponytail.

Maybe I’m just looking for an excuse to postpone the date. I’m feeling kind of fat this week.

So yesterday he asked me if I’m still free tonight, and if so did I want to get together? I sent him the following reply:

Actually…I kinda forgot that I don’t like going on dates during the week. Are you free Friday?

It turns out he is not free, Friday or the rest of the weekend. I’m going away next weekend, so it seems like a weekday will be my only option regardless. So maybe I should just get it over with tonight.

I know I seem less than enthusiastic about this guy, but he’s actually pretty cute. BUT…last night I decided to re-read his profile taking into account all the things I missed when I first read Manchild’s profile, and there are two possible red flags:

1 – In his “Looking for” section, he put “new friends” and “activity partners.” No mention of long-term dating.

2 – In his “I’m really good at” section, he lists a whole bunch of things and then at the end adds “I am also good at a few other things that I probably shouldn’t list here, but… kissing???” That’s only slightly less sexually suggestive than answering that question with a winky face, in my opinion.

Overall, though, it seems like we have a bit in common, so I might as well go.

I just sent him the following message:

Hmm…I can’t decide what to do! I get out of work at 5:30, and if I kill time by going to the gym then I will not be cute when we meet up!

I’m pretty sure he’s gonna be like “So what? Just come, blah blah blah.” Stay tuned…


About notchangingmyname

I'm a thirty-something, about-to-be-divorced, former blogger trying to navigate single life.
This entry was posted in Blog, Dating, Life, Personal and tagged , , , , . Bookmark the permalink.

15 Responses to Possible OkCupid date tonight

  1. benja1974 says:

    Just relax and enjoy it… 🙂

  2. Good luck! and keep us posted 🙂

  3. ditchthemarriage says:

    I think you need a guy who will take you out on a weekend date 🙂 but a weekday is ok, for a start…

  4. Seb says:

    Ponytails are cute. Work with that.

  5. SillyG says:

    Just go with your pony! Everytime I went on date post gym, guys said I looked great. I think its cause cheeks are full of colour and am destressed from the workout. Have fun!

  6. emarie24 says:

    I like weekday dates because I like my weekends for the more important friends. And I would love it if I could just be like, “Hey, I’m cool with meeting up, but since you can’t meet up till later, I’m coming from the gym.” I hate having to get all dolled up for a date and feel better in gym clothes anyway, and that gives me an excuse! Being able to meet up the other night after work (in scrubs) freed me up from feeling guilty for not getting ready for the date AT ALL.

    • This was the first time that I ever considered meeting up with someone after the gym, and I liked the idea of it! Figured let him see me at my “worst,” and then he’ll only be more impressed the next time we meet. But I ended up having the time to go home and shower and do my hair…which was fine because I would have had to do that for work the next morning anyway.

  7. Oooh, I’m so interested to hear how it turns out. I hope you have an amazing time and come back to tell us all about it ASAP! 🙂

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