I am in such a good mood right now. It’s 7:40 in the morning, and as I’m writing this I’m sitting in an airplane, waiting for it to take off and bring me to New Orleans so I can see Dave again. Yay!
After they read my last blog post, in which I talked about my amazing week with Dave, two of my friends asked me if I was in a relationship with him. I guess it’s because I used the term “long-distance relationship” in that post. Well, when I wrote that post, no, Dave and I were not in a relationship. Before he left we had decided we would just see where things went, no pressure.
But now Dave and I ARE in an “official” relationship. A few days after that post he asked me if I wanted to be exclusive, and I said yes, I did. It’s crazy. Me with a boyfriend! I haven’t had a boyfriend in 12 years, since before I got married.
My friends definitely have mixed feelings on the whole thing. Some are happy for me; some are skeptical.
When I told one of them that Dave had asked me to be his girlfriend, and that I had said yes, she said, “That’s nice! How do you feel about it?” I said I felt good, even though I know the whole thing is kind of sudden and crazy. She said, “Well, it is really fast, but it’s fine, call him your boyfriend. I mean, you’re still open to meeting other guys, right? Like, if we were out and some guy tried talking to you, you would engage, right?” I gave it a few seconds of serious consideration and then said no, I didn’t think I would. She said, “Oh, wow. Now THAT is crazy.” I made a face and she said something along the lines of: “I don’t know, I just don’t think you should be limiting yourself and putting all of your eggs in one basket. Especially when that basket is so far away and has a kid.”
She went on to talk about how hard long-distance relationships are (she was in one once), and about all of the sacrifices I will have to make, particularly because he has a kid. For example, if the time does come when Dave and I decide we want to really be together, it’s not even an option for him to move up to New York. I am the one who is going to have to give up my life and move down to New Orleans, which could lead to bitterness and resentment on my part. She also talked about the general day-to-day sucky-ness of long-distance relationships, like when you want to get dinner or go to the movies or cuddle and you can’t.
I understand all of the points she was trying to make. They were all very valid and logical. (Except for her saying that it’s crazy for me to not talk to other guys. I mean, why would I agree to be exclusive if I’m going to act like I’m single? For that I would have just told Dave that we should wait a little while longer and see how things developed…ahhhh, maybe that was the point she was trying to make. Got it.)
Regardless, when it comes to matters of the heart, it’s hard to be logical! I appreciate the fact that I have people around me who are trying to keep me grounded in reality (they just love me after all, and only want what’s best for me), but I really like Dave, so all I can do at this point is continue on the path I’m on and see where it leads.