I was born and raised in New York City. I got married at 22, which by NYC standards practically made me a child bride. That marriage didn’t work out so well, as I am now 33 and about to be divorced. Was it getting married so young that was the mistake, or was it the fact that I only knew my husband for 5 months before we got married? Hmmm.

By the time I met my husband I had been writing down my “Thought of the Day” on my own personal website for like 3 years. This was way before most people (including myself) had ever even heard the word “blog.” After dealing with some drama caused by me revealing some very personal things about myself on my website, I had created a new, completely anonymous website. I didn’t tell ANYONE I knew in real life about my website. Thus, I was able to talk about whatever and whomever I wanted without worrying about the consequences. I had a nice-sized audience and was part of an amazing online community where I was able to express myself completely.

It all came to an end a few months after I got married. My husband didn’t like me telling the world all this personal stuff about our lives. Even though I never used our real names and nobody even knew who I was, I respected his feelings and stopped writing about him and the things we did together. This inevitably led to fewer and fewer entries. I tried to switch it up and started writing only about politics, but I didn’t have a genuine interest in the subject and that didn’t last too long.

My site had already become too much of a headache to be enjoyable, but I ended up abandoning it altogether when one day my husband came home from work and told me that he had told his boss about my website and given him the site address. I couldn’t believe it. Still can’t, actually. Why the fuck did he do that?!?? It was such a violation. He said he didn’t realize how important it was to me that I keep it private. Hmph.

That was way back in 2002. We’ve been separated for 3 years now, and are getting divorced soon. Last month I decided that I wanted to start blogging again. And so I am.


34 Responses to About

  1. Saw you stopped by my site and thought I’d pop by yours. Sorry I took so long getting here. Life just seems to ‘sweep’ me up sometimes.
    This forum is the perfect place to get back into the swing of life. That’s why I began my blog. To take back my identity, have my own voice, and just plain bitch, I guess. (I have a husband who isn’t too keen sometimes on my content of posts. Tough, huh?)
    I’ve been divorced twice. This is hubby number 3. They get younger each time. ((wink..wink)) You’ll get through it. Just remember..”Don’t grieve when they leave”. He didn’t die. He was apparently not ‘right’ for you, or he’d still be with you. Save your grieving for great losses.
    Hope your transition is a smooth one. Hope to visit with you more later. 🙂

    • Haha love it! I am definitely NOT grieving lol.

      Yeah that’s why I stopped blogging in the first place, because hubby thought I was posting stuff that was too personal…and then for some reason he showed his boss my website, which forced me to edit myself and then led to me abandoning it altogether.

      Thanks for the kind words! 🙂

  2. David Fair Jr. says:

    I now know where your username comes from. Keep up the positive, forward-thinking attitude. I have the utmost confidence that you are capable of great things.

  3. Thanks for stopping by my blog.
    I am so glad you decided to start writing again – it’s a great way to reclaim your identity through this transition in your life.
    Wishing you all the best!! 🙂

  4. Will says:

    Sometimes the best things happen from the most unexpected decisions/places.

  5. Tony Bird says:

    Thanks for following my blog! I thought I’d stop by and return the favor. Best of luck with your post-divorce endeavors.

  6. Heya! Thanks for following my blog!
    That’s unfortunate that your ex was getting upset about your writing. I think it’s best to get things out there in the open so everything isn’t so bottled up, but I guess not everyone agrees, haha. Congratulations on finding the will to start anew! I’m enjoying your posts so far (especially your posts that motivate me to get off my lazy ass and lose weight too)!

  7. andy1076 says:

    Hi! Thank you for coming by and following my blog 🙂 🙂

  8. Jueseppi B. says:

    Welcome back. His loss, our gain.

  9. Craig Hill says:

    Good to see that you have stuck with writing through all the changes in life circumstances. Hope it lasts for a lot longer.

  10. So glad that you are writing still–it is good for the soul, and you have important experience to share.

  11. Lisa says:

    I also started my blog during a transitional point in my life. It is so refreshing to share your thoughts with others. Glad you are back..and not anonymous! Share on!

  12. ellyvegas1 says:

    You are soo pretty! I finally got around to reading some of your posts and I gotta admit I’m kinda hooked! Your dating stories remind me soo much of my past experiences too (well before the hubs of course)! And I can totally relate to drunk first dates whoops…

  13. Nowan Zen says:

    I started writing because…..well……I don’t truthfully know. The words started flowing and Tah Dah! Perhaps it a way to give voice to the critters in my head. Several arguments there.

    Life transitions are seldom easy and, just as a matter of perspective, most men are not overly bright (bring one, I’m familiar with this quite intimately). And having gone through a divorce, I can, to some degree, empathize with the irritations and frustrations.

    Thank you for allowing me to poke about here and enjoy the thinking. 🙂

  14. Castimonia says:

    Wait, did I read that right? You are getting divorced over blogging or something to that effect? WOW!

    • Hahaha no you didn’t read it right! That would be crazy. The blogging thing happened way early in our relationship, we were married for 10 years after that. 🙂

      • Castimonia says:

        Whew, I was starting to think this blogging stuff was serious business. Hope both of you work on yourselves and whatever issues both had in disolving the relationship so that the next one is much better! Good luck, may God grant you serenity!

  15. fivereflections says:

    nice to meet you

    David in Maine USA

  16. Linus says:

    Good for you for reclaiming not only your life, but your passion! I too struggle with the issue of what and how much to reveal. I don’t know if I am making the right choice, but it feels right to me so I guess that has to say something. Good luck with everything going forward…

  17. Hey, just so ya know ..your image in ” about the author”…..lovely image of you!

  18. Rogers says:


    I am developing a website on recipes from around the world. Its called http://www.foodival.com.

    Will your be interested in posting your recipes on it?


    Rogers Chelot

  19. Ariella says:

    Hi! Just wanted to let you know I nominated you for the Versatile Blogger Award. Your blog is different from the blogs I usually read, (not solely about cheating lol)but I truly enjoy reading about your life and dating! 🙂 Reading your blog puts a smile on my face!

  20. Subhan Zein says:

    I admire your honesty and I think I could learn much from your blog. I’m happily subscribing to your blog.

    I hope the sun keeps shining brightly in your heart and the sea will remain blue in the part of your horizon.

    Keep spreading the truth and have a lovely day! 🙂

    Subhan Zein

  21. I’m glad that you started back blogging and doing what you love. I am happily divorced and it’s nothing like having something that you enjoy taken away at the expense of a non-supportive spouse (sigh), okay Cherry, get off your soap box LOL.
    I have to say that, NOW I am back into the swing of things and doing what I love and am truly happy. We were separated for 5 years but divorced for 1 year now. Keep sending out great posts and I will be tuning in each chance I get!

  22. Pingback: The LIST Entire « mysexlifewithlola

  23. Girl you look great !! I’m so proud of you 🙂 your your blog has really grown ! I love all the posts and information on here ! It’s making me take a couple looks at what I can do to mine ❤ keep it up!!

  24. evanlau says:

    did u use to blog at urbankitten.com?

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